What do I do with you? It’s all academic now I know. You came into my life with your snow white hair, your entreaties to touch your fused spine and you assertions that you just have to get up in the morning and get shit done, spine or not!

I crushed you from the start. I got your number and brought you food. I know about food and it’s my way of connecting. My way of connection is being touched, and you did that.

I knew you owned a bar. Vietnam bar. That’s why I brought you spring rolls, but I didn’t really think it through. Here I was 23 years clean and sober and I was hanging around in a drinking establishment watching guys pass their revolvers around.

It came alot clearer on your birthday though. I was in a space that I couldn’t be in. I will miss your vibrancy and outgoing personality along with the people I briefly met. I miss you!